Wednesday, June 29, 2016

Dear Mother Nature,

Hey, lady! How ya been? Good, I hope. Say, I was just thinking about all the awesome sunshine you've treated us to lately, and, also kind of wondering if you would maybe see fit to give us some more this weekend? See, we are taking the boat and RV to the lake and it would be really great if we could actually, you know, play outside? I mean, the RV is great and all, but, I don't really think anyone wants to celebrate Independence Day stuck inside a hot, muggy motorhome while it pours buckets outside. I certainly don't.

Anyway, just thought it would be worth it to ask. We're cool, either way.


Have you lost weight? You look really, really good.

Tuesday, June 28, 2016

Tonight, On Biiiiig Brother

I remember when this show used to be fresh and interesting.

Wow. I'm showing my age.

For years when the children were small, Big Brother was the yardstick by which I measured summer; the smaller the number of houseguests, the closer we were to the beginning of another school year.  Now, the show simply provides background noise to my internet surfing or to whatever else I am doing while it is airing. That's kind of sad.

I am really going to have to come up with some new entertainment strategies once this nest is completely empty.

Monday, June 27, 2016

Ah, Monday, We Meet Again

You know, despite having only four days in my work week, I still feel like I'm not getting enough down time. That's pretty ridiculous and greedy of me, isn't it?

Don't answer that.

So, it's Monday, again. I have mixed emotions about Monday; on the one hand, I am energized and ready to tackle the goals on my weekly To Do at Work list. On the other, I am still in weekend mode, and, would be perfectly content to spend a leisurely morning on the porch.

I wonder if Day Job would be cool with a three-day week?

Probably not.

Thank goodness my weekend was pretty relaxing; hosting the Booster social was the most energetic thing I did. Otherwise, I spent time in my garden, picking the random weed and mentally willing my Brussels sprouts plants to produce while verbally encouraging the tomatoes to ripen "Come on, San Marzanos, mama's got a Bucket List with your name on it".

Speaking of the Bucket List, I can also scratch seeing Independence Day: Resurgence off the list; Hugh, the Man-Cub and I saw it last night after a dinner at the Chinese buffet. The movie was ok, I may have enjoyed the original a little more, but, it was still a pleasant way to spend the evening.

Prior to that, I had been on my own for the weekend; Hugh was in Mount Pilot at a wrestling clinic and the Man-Cub was in a nearby town at basketball camp. I took advantage of my solitude by cranking up The Highway on Serius XM and dancing around the house with a broom and dust rag. Because I know how to party, clearly.

I also ate the rest of the brie from Porch Night, so don't feel too sorry for me.

Then, last night, after the movie, while the Cub and I were relaxing on the couch; Hugh went into full Cop Mode after hearing what he thinks were gunshots in our neighborhood (no confirmation at this point); he came blazing down the stairs from his office, firing off commands to us like we were his own personal SWAT team. The Cub and I hit the lights and dropped to our bellies on the floor, where we crawled around, locking doors and securing the pets while Hugh radioed in the report and then left to cruise the neighborhood in his patrol car.

We were given the all-clear about thirty minutes later and went back to our regularly scheduled couch surfing, and, that was the excitement for the weekend.

Which, brings us back again to Monday. 


Saturday, June 25, 2016

Porch Night with the Boosters

I hosted the Boosters Club Social on the porch last night and we could not have asked for better weather. We definitely could have asked for a better turnout, but, at this point I have resigned myself to the sad fact that we are outnumbered by people who want to have everything done for them while making no effort on their part.

That realization sucks, but, whatcha gonna do?

I can tell you that we are going to do our level best to raise a record amount of fund for this year's Senior Sports Banquet, at which we will hire a caterer, an MC, and black-tie servers so that we, as the parents of Seniors, can sit back and enjoy the evening without having to bust our asses (like we have for the past three years). Then, when the Treasurer hands over an empty bank account to next year's club (assuming they can pull together enough volunteers to have a club), they can plan a banquet featuring canned beans and hot dogs.

Karma, bitches.

All of this was decided at the meeting last night, in between sipping on wine and munching on snacks that included a triple-cream brie, spread on a rosemary water cracker with a dab of fig jam on top (Oh, my sweet LORD, to die for!) and a petit fours assortment that included lemon sponge, white cake with raspberry, and angel food with a blueberry ribbon. And, that was just an appetizer and dessert, the main course featured meatballs that had been slow cooking all day, loaded baked potato skins, and sliced deli meat sliders. It was a delicious evening, even with the bad taste in our mouths regarding the turnout.

And, the porch was the perfect location, as always.

I'll take a disappointing meeting on the porch over a crowded meeting in the school library, any day.

I'm Becoming a Crazy Cat Lady, Only, With Roses

Rose bushes were buy-one-get-one-free at the nursery today and, I could not resist. I purchased a gorgeous apricot rose called Just Joey and a pale pink  rose called Bride's Dream. They are both beautiful and healthy and I planted them in the back yard, where, God willing, they will root in deeply and bloom for years to come.

Or, Rowdie will find a way to pull them out and I will find them scattered in a million chewed-upon pieces in the yard, in which case, I may have a yellow lab in need of a new home.


Kind of.

Just Joey

Bride's Dream

Thursday, June 23, 2016

All Better Now

This afternoon, the heavens opened up and poured forth a rainstorm so fierce, it flooded the streets of Hooterville, turning parking lots into lakes, swamping businesses, and marooning people in their cars until the storm subsided.

I watched it from the warmth and dryness of my office while eating a pink-frosted Granny B's sugar cookie and sipping on a latte from Starbucks.

As I headed home, the concerns I had for my garden were completely alleviated when I hit the Petticoat Junction town line and it became obvious that the storm had taken an abrupt right, bypassing the town and sparing my fragile vegetation from both the hammering rain and the high winds.

Currently, the sky is clear and the winds are calm.

It is Thursday, which, is technically my Friday.

I am about to head to a fellow Booster Club Mom's house for a product party that is sure to include wine, and, the pain in my foot has improved since this morning (Please, please, please don't let it be the beginning of plantar fasciitis, again).

I'm in a far less bitchy mood than earlier, is the point I'm trying to make.

On a totally unrelated topic, I've heard that having rapid mood swings can be an early symptom of menopause, but, since I've also heard that it can be a symptom of simply being a bitch, I'm not going to worry too much about it.

Time will tell!

Things That Make Me Frown

The weather the past couple of days has been cloudy, windy, and overall unpleasant, which, is fine since I am in the office all day, but, it better get with the program tomorrow because momma needs a pleasant weekend.

The crappy weather is affecting my mood, and today I am going to bitch about things that irritate me. Because it's my blog and I'll bitch if I want to.

1.  Weeds in my garden and flower beds. The fight, it is neverending.

2.  One of our fire alarms shit the bed last night; we know this because it went of at 2:00 this morning, waking us from our slumber with an ear-piercing shriek. I'm still shaking as I type this.

3.  My feet have been giving me fits, lately. Specifically, my right foot. I have no idea what its' problem is but I grow weary from the aching, swelling, and general pain.

There is more. A lot more, but, I am already running late for work and, I do try to be a mostly positive person, so I will leave it as this.

Which, is depressing and morose.

Tune in later today, when I try to redeem myself with a cheerful post.

Or, not.