Monday, April 29, 2013

Round Two of Promapalooza

While the Cub and I were bonding over basketball, The Teenager was attending her second prom of the season. It was the first time that I haven't been in attendance to help her with her preparations for a special event, but, I think she managed just fine on her own.

It was her choice to wear her dress from last year rather than buying a new one, and, she saved money by doing her own hair rather than making an appointment at the salon. Her nails were still fairly perfect from when she had them done for her prom and she had her choice of heels, thanks to the collection that she has been accumulating over the past two years.

Because The Teenager had stepped in as an almost-last-minute replacement for her date's ex-girlfriend; his mother purchased his boutonniere, so, when all was said and done, the only money that we put into the event was for the professional pictures that we will pick up in a couple of weeks.

Of course, knowing how I am about having pictures, The Teenager borrowed one of my cameras, and, her date's parents were kind enough to use it to capture some candid shots for me. I appreciated their thoughtfulness.

That thoughtfulness, and the minimum amount of money required to fund the enterprise, made it easier for me to overlook the fact that The Teenager's date ditched her after the dance to party with his friends. The fact that he did so didn't appear to phase The Teenager at all, as they had attended the dance with another couple and The Teenager was perfectly fine with hanging out with them rather than "babysitting" a "party boy".

I am raising a smart one, there.

Really, I am.

I did mention that she was accepted to National Honor Society, right?

Beauty and brains.

Someday, the right boy will appreciate both of those things.

For the record, I don't think it will be the boy that she is attending this upcoming weekend's prom with as she has made a point of saying that he is, much like her last two prom dates, just a good friend.

And, yes, if you are counting; the child will have attended three proms in four weeks. My discretionary budget for formal portraits is being strained to the limits; thank goodness she has a dress, shoes, hair accessories, jewlry, and, you know, a job.

Sunday, April 28, 2013

Road Trippin' With the Man-Cub

My weekend with the Cub was just what I needed.

I got to bond with my second-born, to watch the Fearsome Foursome play a game they love, to visit with other moms, to relax and sleep in, and, to spend time in one of my favorite places on Earth.

I can't think of a much better way to spend my time.

And, while the boys didn't exactly come out on the winning side, they did have a really good time playing the game. I know I say it a lot, but; those boys really are the best sports. They pick each other up when they are feeling down, celebrate one another's successes, and, support each other when the going gets tough. Plus, they crack me up with their crazy antics.

When they weren't playing ball, the boys killed time in the hotel pool and flirting with the girls from a team that was also in town for the tournament. For the record, their score with the ladies rated pretty similarly to their score on the court, which was to say; they lost more than they won.

Speaking of scoring, the Man-Cub had his highest-scoring game at the tournament. It has been a privilege to watch him grow this season, from being slightly timid to aggressive in a good way. He drives to the basket with a speed and agility that he didn't have during the school basketball season and he no longer hesitates to take a shot when he is open.

AAU has been a good experience, one that will benefit the Cub, immensely, if he is to play for the High School, which, considering he recently brought home the paperwork for summer camps; I assume he is.

Of course, the weekend wasn't just about basketball. As I said earlier, it was also a great opportunity for me to re-connect with my son, and; I think we did just that.

The boys finished the tournament at 5:00 last night, after which, the Cub and I went out to dinner at a fabulous steakhouse not far from our hotel. Over dinner, we talked about anything and everything, including the fact that his hand is now bigger than mine; a fact that I could have gone without acknowledging, thankyouverymuch.

We then returned to our room, where I forced the child to watch the original Footloose. I enjoyed tripping down memory lane while the Cub enjoyed taunting me about the 80's fashions, music, dance moves and hairstyles; it was a fair trade.

This morning, after a deliciously long night's sleep, we started back home, stopping in the city of my Alma Mater along the way. The Cub has spent time with me there numerous times, but this was the first time that it was just the two of us.

I stopped at all the places that I thought a fourteen year old boy would appreciate, including a local honey farm, where we got to watch the honeybees travel through a translucent pipe into a Plexiglas hive where the queen bee was busy directing the worker bees in their honey-making duties.

After that, we stopped at a natural spring, where the Cub got a chance to play King of the Mountain. It should be noted that he was the undisputed champion of the game since there was no way in hell I was dragging my ass up the thing.

By the time we got home, it was late afternoon. I asked the Cub if he was tired of me yet, and, to his credit, he lied and said "Of course not".

I don't know when we will have the opportunity to spend as much solo time together, again. In the meantime, I will hold on to the memories of this weekend and hope that, when we do get the chance to road trip together again, we will have as much fun together as we did on this trip.

Friday, April 26, 2013

Weekend Road Trip

The Man-Cub and I are heading out of town for the last basketball tournament of the AAU season. We are making the trip, just the two of us, because Hugh has a cabinet installation to do and because The Teenager will be attending prom in Pixler.

Her Pixler prom date is the son of a friend of mine and The Teenager is a next-to-the-last-minute replacement date for the girl who broke his heart. I'm glad she's going and I know they will have a good time; I'm just sorry I have to miss it.

My friend, it should be noted, will take tons of pictures, so; it's not like I won't see what they look like, but I'll still miss being there.

While I'm missing being there, however, I also plan to enjoy my solo time with my son; we don't get enough time together and I'm looking forward to getting reacquainted. And, to watching him turn bright pink and visibly sink into the car door when I question him about his date for continuation.

That's what I call "quality parenting".

Wednesday, April 24, 2013


The Teenager received her acceptance letter for National Honor Society, today.

I don't have the words to adequately describe how proud I am of her.

Well, I do, but, the lump in my throat makes it impossible to vocalize without sounding like I'm crying, which, of course I'm not!

If I were crying, though, it would totally be because I keep picturing my baby on her first day of school, or, remembering how proud she was of the first 100% she got on a spelling test, or, recalling how excited she was when she was asked to be a Pirate Peer Mediator in the fifth grade.

And, now she has a brand-new accomplishment to add to her list.

I'm proud, you know?

Of course you know.

Tuesday, April 23, 2013

Enjoying Some Downtime

Last night, I had the pleasure of spending the evening with the Porch Ladies, although, since April is bi-polar and can't decide between spring-like weather and temperatures better suited to the arctic tundra; we enjoyed one another's company in the comfort of my friend's living room instead of on the porch. And, that was ok, because; I got to relax and enjoy a party that I didn't have to plan.

Speaking of planning, details for the Man-Cub's continuation ceremony and dance are well in hand, especially considering that four members of the planning committee were in attendance at last night's party, and, we tend to do our best work while under the influence of wine.

The planning has continued on the home front, as well: the Man-Cub requested-and was granted-a new shirt, vest and tie for the occasion. The reason he wanted the clothing was so that he would match his date.

Yes, his date.

The reason I wanted to buy him the clothing was because he had outgrown every other item of dress-clothing that he owned, and, despite my fervent desire to keep him my baby forever; I just couldn't allow him to attend the dance in sleeves that hit just below his elbows.

I don't think his date would have approved, either.

Anyway, he is now the proud owner of a pair of black dress pants, a lavender dress shirt, a black vest and a dark purple tie. He's going to look styling' and will most definitely match his date, who is wearing a lavender-hued dress.

And, knowing her father, a chastity belt.

Not that she would need it.

I'm just saying.

Sunday, April 21, 2013

A Moment in Time, Part Three

....this is the last of the prom posts, I promise. Well, at least until next week, when The Teenager attends her second prom of the season.

Just kidding.

But, not really.

Anyway, when last I posted, we had just left the kids on the porch, enjoying the photo booth and all of the accessories that it entailed.

Once that was out of the way, we set about immortalizing the evening in song. Ha! Totally kidding; I can only imagine the look of horror on The Teenager's face, were I to burst into song whilst all her friends were in attendance.

Actually, give me just a second to savor the thought....

....and, done.

Rather than sing about the youthful beauty on display at my house last night, I photographed it for posterity. You know, like I do.

When I couldn't possibly take yet another picture, we gathered the kids in the dining room for dinner. Hugh and I shuttled back and forth between the kitchen and dining room, serving food, refilling water glasses and trying to be both attentive and discreet. It was a challenge, but we managed.

The kids were finished with dinner and dessert in record time and out the door to drive to Hooterville for the Grand March, which was being held in the community event center. Hugh and I followed not long after and, I recommenced with the picture-taking. Like I do.

After the Grand March, we visited with the kids for just a bit before taking our leave of them. Before we did that, I had the chance to take a few last photographs, including a couple of The Teenager and a friend of hers who happens to be the son of a friend of mine.

I think they may have a future in daytime television.

Finally, as Hugh and I left the venue, I looked back at our daughter. This is the last that I saw of her until she arrived home at three o'clock this morning....

I think she had a good time, as did Hugh and I. I've been blessed to have the opportunities to watch The Teenager experience her high school memories and I can't say enough how grateful I am for that.

I'm also grateful for the parents of The Teenager's date, who sent me home with an awesome gift bag when  I dropped The Teenager off at their house, yesterday. It was meant as a thank-you to us for making the kids' dinner for prom and I think it was a very sweet gesture.

Also? Not kidding when I said it was awesome...

I'm going to have to get to know these people even better, me thinks.

A Moment in Time, Part Two

....and, after a long night's sleep, we're back.

Well, after four hour's sleep, anyway.

So, were was I? Umm...oh, yes, steak was grilling, shrimp was chilling, the table had been set in as fancy a presentation as possible, which, was fancy enough if a comment from one of The Teenager's friends is any indication; and, I quote: "I feel like I'm on the Titanic".

Which, I chose to take as a compliment and not as a portent of impending doom, mostly because I was relatively confident that we wouldn't hit an iceberg at any point in the evening.

And, we didn't. Hit any icebergs, I mean. We did hit the photo booth and I think the kids had a good time. I admit I was a wee bit worried that the kids wouldn't think the idea was quite as cool as I did, but, that fear proved unfounded as all of the kids got into the action to one degree or another, including The Teenager's best male friend, who wasn't even going to the prom; he just stopped by to tell The Teenager how pretty she was.

After the kids got the craziness out of their systems, we took some far more serious pictures. Well, as serious as you can get with this particular group of kids, which, isn't very serious at all.

I have a lot more that I would like to share, but, this post is getting pretty picture heavy, so I think I'll call it a day.

Also, it is a little known fact that, when one hosts a party, one must eventually clean up after one's guests, and I'm not quite finished with that, yet.

So, until next time....

A Moment in Time, Part One

It's two thirty in the morning and I am awaiting The Teenager's return from her prom date. The fact that I am awake at this hour is a testament to the devotion that I have to the child, because, people, I am tired.

I started the day-yesterday, I guess it was-with an early wake up call; the house required cleaning prior to the kids descending upon us, and, despite all my best intentions; I had not had the energy to tackle the chore Friday evening when I returned from my conference in Neighboring City (side note: boringest conference in the history of boring conferences, and, I know a thing or two about boring conferences). So, it was up with the sun to get started.

My first order of business was the early prep for the prom dinner planned for the evening. Our planned menu consisted of individual Caesar salads, Surf 'n Turf- in the form of grilled steaks and shrimp cocktail- baked potatoes with all the fixings, and, for dessert, an assortment of brownies.

Since most of the actual cooking would take place closer to the event, I had only to do some quick chopping for the salads and to start the baked potatoes (side note: have you ever baked your potatoes in a crock pot? No? Do it. Really, do it; easiest and tastiest baked potatoes I have made in my entire life). A quick organization of the items that Hugh would need when cooking the steaks, and, I was done.

Then, it was time to set the table in what I hoped would be teenager-approved dining decor before diving into the really tedious work: house cleaning.

Once that chore was done to my exacting standards (hours later, I swear to god), I gathered up the items for the photo booth and got them set up on the front porch. Despite starting off a bit nasty, the weather improved significantly as I was working and I was able to breath a sigh of relief on that front.

By the time I was finished with the porch, it was time to drive The Teenager into Hooterville for her scheduled hair appointment. I left the remainder of the preparations for the night's dinner in Hugh's capable hands and off we went.

After The Teenager's hair was teased and curled and combed into a style fit for a princess...

... we popped into Oscar and Emily's to get her dressed. Since The Teenager's date attends school in Hooterville, it was easier to get ready there than to drive back to Petticoat Junction, and, since her date's parents wanted a chance to get their own pictures of the kids, it was easiest for me to drop The Teenager off at their house before heading back to Petticoat Junction to put the finishing touches on dinner. It also gave me an opportunity to meet the boy's parents, which, went really well.

How dinner went, as well as the rest of the story, will have to wait until tomorrow, however, as it is now 3:15 and my eyes are starting to get very, very tired. Plus, The Teenager just got home and I am now officially off-duty and ready to hit the hay.

So, until tomorrow (or, later today, I suppose).....

Friday, April 19, 2013

When Is a Friday Not a Friday?

When you are staring down a long line of chores that have to be accomplished before Saturday, that's when.

Ordinarily, I would be working half a day with ample time to accomplish all of the items on my To Do list, but, the universe being the smart ass that we all know it to be; today I am scheduled to attend a full day conference in Neighboring City.

Tomorrow is prom. I am hosting six kids for a fancy sit-down dinner as well as chauffeuring The Teenager to her hair appointment and to the florist to pick up her date's boutonniere. The Teenager would drive herself on those errands, but, we need to drop her off at her date's house so that his parent's can take pictures of them before they head back to our house for the dinner; dinner which I still need to shop for, to prep for, and, ultimately, to prepare.

I also still need to prepare the props for the photo booth, and, I need to clean off the front porch in order to set up the actual booth. I'm not even going to mention the housework that needs to happen inside before I can even begin to fathom inviting people in, but, I'm sure you can use your imagination.

I'm going to be busy, is my point.

Working only half a day would have been quite helpful, is my other point.

I'm feeling very pointy today.

Wednesday, April 17, 2013

That Fucking Groundhog Should be Shot

I just woke up to two inches of new snow; I am so over this winter bullshit.

I have a prom to photograph this weekend.

My daffodils are holding up, but the tulips have yet to bloom, so the chance of having a flowerbed full of color for the a photo backdrop is looking less and less likely. And, you know, I'm disinclined to pose the girls in snow that rivals the height of their heels.

My son will be traveling over the most treacherous pass in the state on Friday, and, he's doing it without me. Sure, he will be in the care of a parent whom I trust completely, but; read the part about the most treacherous pass in the state and try to tell me not to worry.

I have a closet full of really cute sandals that I would really like to start wearing to work and my winter wardrobe is starting to grate on my last nerve.

In short, I am really, really tired of winter and ready for a change. We can start with hiring a new groundhog; one that doesn't get our hopes up with a prediction of an early spring when he knows damn good and well that we are going to be freezing our asses off in April.

Little bastard.

Tuesday, April 16, 2013

Another Day, Another Event to Plan

I think I mentioned that I am on the planning committee for the Man-Cub's continuation ceremony/dance. My duties for the event include hiring a photographer to take formal portraits and organizing the decorations. I already have the photographer taken care of as well as a plan in place for taking candid photos of the kids as they enjoy the party, so, no problems, there.

The decorations have also been a breeze, thanks to the fact that my co-committee member was able to provide left-over decorations from a gala that her nonprofit organization held this winter. Once we inventoried everything that she had to offer, it was a simple matter of picking up a few extra things, and, lucky for us, a party store in Hooterville was going out of business and we bought all of the paper plates, forks, napkins, table covers and a slew of additional decorations at liquidation prices (we are talking, $1 per item).

The only thing we have left to do is the actual, you know, decorating. Unfortunately, we have been told that the earliest we can get into the school to do that is 3:30, which, doesn't give us much time since the event starts at 7:00 and we all want to have time to feed our children and revel in their adorableness prior to the dance.

As one does.

Anywaayyy...we are trying to convince the school to let us in before school lets out. Cross your fingers for us.

Sunday, April 14, 2013

That's Mo Bettah

The Teenager has recovered slightly from her encounter with the death-defying Middle Schoolers. He of the Broken Foot (just a toe, really) brought her flowers and a letter of apology for launching himself into her car (and into her nightmares) and the kids at school are careful to couch their teasing of her with the classic phrase "Too soon?".

 It. Is. Hilarious.

The parents of the kids involved have already called our insurance company to accept full responsibility and have pledged to repair the side-view mirror on The Teenager's car. Hugh contacted our glass guy-the man who has replaced the windshield on the Tahoe twice now-and he is going to give the family a really great deal, so; everyone comes out not much the worse for wear. Well, except for the broken toe, of course.

He'll heal, he'll heal.

On the topic of death-defying Middle Schoolers; the Fearsome Foursome was hard at it this weekend, shooting hoops and causing the ladies to swoon. The swooning had more to do with the sight of blood from one of their teammates noses following a particularly aggressive attempt at a rebound, but, there was swooning, nonetheless.

The tournament was our local club's fundraiser so the parents were expected to help with the duties involved in running such an event. For my part, I got up at 5:00 Saturday morning to work the early shift taking admissions. It didn't seem like that big of a deal when I originally signed up for it, but, by the time the boys played their last game at 5:00 p.m., I was really starting to drag ass.

The boys likewise started to drag ass around that time and they lost their final game by a pretty large margin, after having routed a local opponent (and MAJOR nemesis) in the game immediately prior. It was a fairly even showing, I guess, and, the important things held true: the boys had fun, they played with integrity, the club made some decent money and, none of our coaches got called with a technical foul and threatened with being removed from the gym (hello, coach of the MAJOR nemesis team).

And, when I finally got to go to bed at just a bit after midnight (I was waiting up for The Teenager who had been at a surprise birthday party for a friend), I fell into a deep and rejuvenating sleep.

You know, until the cats started jumping on my head six hours later. Breakfast waits for no cat, apparently. Or, the other way around.


Thursday, April 11, 2013

The Teenager is Having a Really Bad Week

You know how, sometimes, you are driving along, minding your own business and a wild animal comes out of nowhere and crashes into your car?

The Teenager had that kind of morning, except, the wild animals were Middle Schoolers.

Yeah....that happened.

Luckily, no one was seriously injured. One of the boys (there were two) has a broken foot from where the car tire ran over him but that is the worst of it.

Also, luckily, there were credible witnesses who were willing to swear that the boys ran into the car while trying to dodge between a gap in school buses and that The Teenager was not to blame; she was driving well under the speed limit and not in a reckless manner, at all.

Perhaps the luckiest part of the story is the fact that three of the credible witnesses are Sheriff's deputies who are stationed at the school (the accident happened right in front of the school). So, it doesn't look as though The Teenager will be getting ticketed or charged in any way.

The boys, on the other hand, will probably get ticketed for not using the crosswalk. I doubt the judge will throw the book at them but I'm also confident that their days of playing Shoot the Gap are over and done.

Unfortunately, The Teenager will require therapy for the rest of her life, but, with us for parents, we kind of saw that coming, anyway.

Tuesday, April 09, 2013

In Which I Am Grateful to be Old

The Teenager is having a crisis involving Prom plans.

She had been planning to attend her prom with a large group of friends who were all going stag. We had arranged for everyone to meet at our house for pictures, including a stab at the photo booth concept, prior to the kids going to the dance. The Teenager has been pretty excited about the plan and was looking forward to the evening.

Flash forward to the last week or so; a new boy has entered the picture and hints are being dropped about him inviting The Teenager to his prom, which, is at another school and, which happens the same night as the Petticoat Junction prom.

The Teenager is torn.

She wants to be with her friends but she also wants to hang out with the new boy.

She wants her photo booth but she also wants to hang out with the new boy.

She doesn't want to hurt her friends' feelings or to let them down, especially since their plans have already been made.

She doesn't want to hurt the new boy's feelings or jeopardize an opportunity to get to know him better.

It's a classic teenage conundrum.

I suggested that she take today to really think about what she wants. I then suggested that she do one of two things, based on her figuring out what, exactly, she does want:
  1. Tell the new boy that she has already made plans and that her father and I are holding her to them. After all, prom is a week and a half away, it is a bit late notice to invite someone to go, now.
  2. Explain to her friends that she wants to go to the Hooterville prom with the new boy, but, that she still plans to have the photo booth at our house before prom for anyone who wants to meet here before the dance for pictures and to hang out, as originally planned.
I have no idea which way she will swing and my heart goes out to her in her dilemma. She really doesn't want to hurt any feelings and knows that the decision could cause that to happen, either way.

It sucks to be young and beautiful and in demand.

Almost as much as it sucks to think that I spent so much time and money planning a pre-prom event that might not happen.

Not that this is about me.

I'm just sayin'.

Sunday, April 07, 2013

Finishing Strong

Spring Break has been salvaged!

The Man-Cub got to tool about the foothills on a dirt bike for two days without his mother hovering about like a worry wort, spoiling his fun.

The Teenager got to go on an overnight camping trip with a group of friends without her father hovering about like a prison guard.

Hugh and I got the house to ourselves for a while.

Rainbows! Unicorns! Everybody's happy!

Also, The Teenager and I took a shopping trip to Neighboring City where we had a blast despite failing to make any real purchases, save for the items that we will be using for props at the photo booth we are planning for prom.

The real enjoyment of the day came from spending time with my daughter, listening to her stories and revelling in the simple things that bring her so much joy; things like her absolute delight at discovering that the mp3 player transmitter that we got for the car included a remote capable of controlling her iPod. Oh, my gawd! The technology! It was killing her!

Today, the children are exhausted from their social outings and the prospect of returning to school tomorrow is weighing heavy on their  minds.

I would feel the same way about the end of the break, you know, had I not been working the entire week.

Rainbows! Unicorns!

Saturday, April 06, 2013

I'm a Little Bit Country, But I Like Rock and Roll

Last night, Hugh and I met up with Chris and Jana at a camping site not far outside of Hooterville. They had loaded up their motor home earlier in the day and set out to secure the campsite, along with the Man-Cub and some other friends of ours.

The plan was for the group to ride dirt bikes during the day, spend the night, and then to ride the bikes again today.

Since I have no desire whatsoever to ride dirt bikes or to camp in the wilderness; Hugh and I opted to pop in for the evening before returning to the warmth and comfort of our own bed.

The night was beautiful, warm enough to be comfortable with just a small campfire and with skies so starry, we felt as though they were close enough to touch, and; we had a really enjoyable time with the group.

My only complaint today is the raging sinus headache caused by the smoke from the campfire. What the hell, body? Are we so old and delicate that we can no longer handle the best part of a woodsy?

Apparently so.

I find this sad, mostly because some of my fondest memories of college are of The Girls and I loading up our cars with city boys, finding a nice, quiet place on the river at which to build our campsite, and, enjoying stories (and beer) around the campfire.

One evening, in particular, stands out in my memory: we had been enjoying a nice evening with the city boys when a group of local yokels approached our camp, threatening to kick the boys asses if we didn't hand over our beer or some such nonsense (the details are a bit fuzzy, it was over twenty years ago after all). The Girls were quite vocal in our reluctance to acquiesce to the local yokels request and things got a bit heated. The city boys grew more and more nervous at the prospect of having their asses handed to them by some overgrown country boys and, they voted to hand over the beer, to break up camp and to move on.

We Girls were having none of that and, Phoebe drew our line in the sand when she picked up an empty beer bottle, broke it against a rock and began waving it at the yokels, daring them to "come and get it".

Country girls can survive, y'all.

The look on the city boys' faces is something that I will never forget: a mixture of horror, awe, shock, and, finally, relief when the yokels backed down and laughingly left us in peace.

That is only one example of the memorable things that happened to me while circled around a campfire with my friends. Of course, The lessons that the city boys took away from those nights were almost as important as the memories we all share. Those lessons include:
  1. How to build a campfire.
  2. How to properly extinguish a campfire.
  3. How to cook an entire meal in the hot coals of a fire, including the recipe for a kick-ass roasted whole chicken and corn on the cob.
  4. How to make the perfect smore.
  5. What a smore was to begin with (Yes, really).
  6. That beer always tastes better in the fresh air, under a starry sky, surrounded by friends in the great outdoors.
  7. The fact that you never, never, never fuck with a country girl.
I wish my weak-ass sinuses would remember that last lesson. Now, I am off to find a Claratin tablet and some Tylenol.

Country girls can survive but modern pharmaceuticals can assist in that effort.

Thursday, April 04, 2013

Lamest Spring Break, EVAH

Or, so my children would have you think. And, while I can't argue that we are having just as much fun here at home as we would be having in some tropical location, I can argue that we are better off than people in a lot of other places.

Like, prison.

Count your blessings, children!

So, how have we spent our Spring Break so far?

Well, The Teenager got to stand on her feet for seven hours while making 400 pizzas.

And, the Man-Cub got to pick up twice the amount of dog poop in the yard, since we have been dog-sitting Oscar and Emily's baby while they've been a warm-although not tropical-location.

And, when I look at it like that, I almost risk losing the argument that I mentioned, previously.

This really is the lamest Spring Break, ever.

Cue the violins, please.

Tuesday, April 02, 2013

We Return to the Program, Already in Progress

So, Easter happened. Chocolate was consumed, as were margarita slushes. What? Your Easter doesn't feature margarita slushes? Huh. You are seriously depriving yourselves, my friends.

Speaking of my friends, Chris, Jana and the kids joined us for Easter dinner (and, for margarita slushes), where, in a feat previously believed impossible; Jana managed to blow a hard boiled egg out of the shell through a teensy-tiny hole in one end of the egg by blowing through an equally teensy-tiny hole in the other end of the egg, leaving behind an intact eggshell and a perfectly intact boiled egg.

It. Was. Ah-mazing.

Not quite as ah-mazing as drinking margarita slushes on the front porch in spring-like weather, but, close.

Also ah-mazing: dinner. More precisely, the glazed ham that I made for dinner. Seriously, best ham I have ever made and I credit the glaze. I would tell you my secret for it, but, then I would have to kill you. Ok, not really; the secret is to slowly reduce a combination of brown sugar, vinegar, Dijon mustard and Dr. Pepper to a thick glaze on the stove top before basting the ham.

Say it with me: Ah-mazing.

In between eating delicious ham, drinking margarita slushes, and watching Jana accomplish the impossible; Jana and I crafted our summer Family Fun bucket list. The list includes:
  • The star gazing party that we never quite got around to throwing last summer.
  • Movie night on the porch.
  • Margarita slushes on the boat, Redneck Yacht Club-style.
  • The annual end-of-school-year slip-n-slide party.
  • Glow-in-the-dark bubbles.
  • Homemade ice cream on the front porch.
  • Porch Nights. Many, many Porch Nights.
I'm sure we will add to the list as summer approaches, but, that's enough to start with for now. And, speaking of now; I have chocolate to eat.

You're shocked, I know.