Monday, October 31, 2011

My Schedule is Scarier than Any Horror Movie

We are coming off a very busy weekend and I am almost too exhausted to give Halloween my usual degree of energy. Of course, I have part of the day left in which to recuperate so; I'm sure I'll come through.

Just how busy was our weekend, you ask? Well, Friday, following a full day of work, I spent four hours at the elementary school, helping the P.E. teacher set up for the annual Halloween Carnival. Technically, I was supervising my ASTRA kids while they helped with the set-up but, there was an awful lot to be done and, since the P.E. teacher just happens to be one of my ladies who "Porch Night"; I would have felt guilty just sitting around while everyone else worked.

Saturday, Hugh and I were up with the sun (and, with the son), to attend the Man-Cub's basketball tournament in Hooterville. The boys played hard, winning their first game by a decent margin before falling in a two-point heart-breaker to the team that they had beaten (ironically, by two points) last Tuesday (or, was it Thursday? The days, they are all blurring together) in the second game.

After the tournament, Hugh and I ran some errands, including a stop at the Natural Market to pre-order my Thanksgiving turkey (yes, Thanksgiving, already. Just be happy I haven't set up my Christmas tree, yet) and a stop at the Hellmouth for some last-minute Halloween supplies.

Later that night, we all donned costumes to attend the Carnival where The Teenager and her ASTRA cohorts were the hit of the night-running eight game booths and providing comic relief where necessary.

The Man-Cub was disappointed when he didn't win the costume contest but, you can't win them all and; his costume was a tad bit on the insensitive side when one takes in to account all the recent shark attacks on beaches around the globe. Of course, when I mentioned this to the Cub, he merely shrugged and said "Well, not in Petticoat Junction". It's really hard to argue that logic and; he and Hugh did spend an ungodly amount of time making that surf board.

Luckily, the rest of the Fearsome Foursome were on hand to take the sting out of the loss. And, there was candy so; all was well.

After the carnival, we raced to the High School to host the  first Annual ASTRA Costume Ball which turned out better than my best expectations (which to be honest, were low). We had a great turnout and the kids had a great time. Of course, by 11:00, I was exhausted and my feet were killing me; I had dressed up like a go-go dancer and, people? Go-go boots are tools of the devil for certain.

I slept in on Sunday (9:00!) before getting up to start round three which included storing away my porch decorations for another year, pulling out the boxes of Halloween crap that Hugh will use for tonight's Haunted Porch, making a salad for the Hooterville chapter of ASTRA which was holding it's annual awards dinner, the usual housework, dipping caramel apples and making a delicious broccoli and cheese soup which I served in bread bowls (verdict: three enthusiastic thumbs up. I'm sure you can guess the lone holdout).

By bedtime, I was exhausted, my feet still hurt (curse you, go-go boots, curse you!) and I was kind of over the whole Halloween thing.

But, today is a new day and I am looking forward to enjoying the fruits of Hugh's labors later tonight. I'm also looking forward to having a nice dinner with Jana and Co., who will be joining us as well as to seeing all the cute costumes that come Trick-or-Treating at our home. I might even put the go-go boots back on.

I'm lying.


Friday, October 28, 2011

In Which My Parenting is Redeemed

The Teenager's arm is not broken, after all. The bone is probably just deeply bruised (gross!). While I realize that my parenting could still be called into question due to the amount of time that it took me to get her to a doctor for a diagnosis; I'm still calling this one a win.

Until we get the radiology bill, of course.

Also, since I was willing to bet cash money on the arm being fractured; it is entirely possible that Las Vegas is no place for me to seek my fortune.

There go my vacation plans.

In Which The Teenager May or May Not Have a Broken Arm

Sometime in the past month, The Teenager "did something weird" to her left wrist and forearm during a volleyball game. She recollects that the "something weird" happened during a dive for the ball and she remembers feeling a jolt to the wrist which resulted in it feeling like it needed to be popped back into place. When her trainers looked at it, however; they could see no obvious problem so they wrapped the wrist and the child continued to play.

And, play, and play and play. By my calculations, the incident occurred the first or second weekend of the month and, since then; she had dutifully wrapped the wrist during practice and games and, while complaining occasionally about the arm being sore, life went on much as usual.

When volleyball finally ended last weekend, the wrapping ceased and the arm become more uncomfortable, not painful, exactly, but, uncomfortable so; I made an appointment to see our pediatrician, yesterday. I assumed the doctor would send us for X-rays and I wasn't wrong; after splinting her wrist, we were sent to the hospital and now we are waiting for a call from the doctor's office, letting us know if it is, indeed, a green-stick fracture or if we are simply dealing with a seriously bruised bone (gross). I'm betting on the former.

If the arm does have a green-stick fracture we will be automatically entered into the running for The Parent of the Year Award because, duh, almost a month with a fracture and we didn't seek medical care; that is some stellar parenting right there.

On the other hand, even if it is a fracture, the pediatrician said that the wrapping had kept the bone stable so; she would recommend that we skip a cast and continue with a splint for another four weeks or so. The Teenager, who has no desire whatsoever to wear a cast, is pulling for that scenario.

Still, I thought I had hit parenting rock-bottom the evening the Man-Cub interrupted Porch Night for a trip to the emergency room and I made him wait in the car until I finished my glass of wine.

This is like a whole new low.

Whaaat?! She waited a MONTH to get you to a doctor?! Are you kidding me?!
I KNOW, right?!

Thursday, October 27, 2011

Throwing in the Towel

I have recently arrived at the conclusion that my gray hair is beyond home intervention. There is no dye on the market that will cover my silver roots for longer than a week and I am sick to death of wasting time, money, energy and emotion over it. That said, I have no desire to sport a head full of granny hair so, with much trepidation; I have scheduled an appointment to have an actual professional tackle my roots. The professional in question assures me that I won't regret the decision to go pro; she guarantees my satisfaction and, she's willing to bet her-really good-reputation on it.

I hope she's right. Also, I hope the cost of the service will be in relation to the money I save on box kits from the Hellmouth, and, if wishes were ponies, beggars would ride.

It's an investment in's an investment in's an investment in me...(if I say it often enough, I will come to believe it).

Because this look is only acceptable one day out of the year.

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Cats Stealing Your Breath at Night: The Myth Exposed

I slept through my alarm this morning and would have missed my whole day had it not been for Finnigan waking me with a kiss and, by kiss, I mean; by licking my face with his fishy-smelling tongue until I awoke from annoyance.

Despite the fact that he has become somewhat nocturnal, lately and is doing his level best to make my nights a waking nightmare, full of nips at my ears and increasingly aggressive smacks to my face; I'm really quite grateful for that kitten and his fishy-smelling tongue because I have a lot to do, today.

That said, as I am writing this, Finn is sleeping peacefully on the couch next to me, he looks adorable, yet; I am sorely tempted to lick his face until he wakes up. I won't, though; I hear hairballs are a bitch to hack up and, as I've said, I have a lot to do, today.

One of my chores will be to wash the Man-Cub's basketball uniform; he sweated it up pretty good at yesterday's game and would prefer to wear it freshly laundered to his game on Saturday. I know, he's totally spoiled, clean laundry! Before you know it he'll start expecting a hot meal on the table every night. Oh, wait...

Anyhoodle, since I'm on the topic of his uniform, I should tell you that his team won their game, yesterday. The final score, 22-25, doesn't reflect the fact that the team trailed for most of the game, rallying in the final quarter to close a twelve-point gap before winning the game. Exciting. And, I'm not being sarcastic when I say that.

Much of the credit for the win goes to The Fearsome Foursome.

Of course, at the time, they were wearing basketball uniforms, I mean, obviously. Due to the crappy nature of the lighting in the old gymnasium in which their game was played, I didn't get a picture of them, however. Also, I think that they have all grown at least a couple of inches since this particular picture was taken at the beginning of the football season. Granted, the Man-Cub is still the shortest but, you know, he's wiry. Wiry? Aye, wiry.

Extra credit if you know what movie that quote is from. Hint: It also involves men in uniforms.

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

I'm Thinking of a Four-letter Word that Starts With S


This brings to mind a few other four-letter words, most of which can't be spoken in polite company.

Hugh is currently in the yard, blowing out our sprinkler system in preparation for the storm that is predicted to move through the area tonight. In the distance, I can see snow already capping the mountain range and, there is a definite bite to the breeze so; I'm going to give the weatherman the benefit of the doubt on this one.

Yesterday, I pulled up the last of the flowers from my flowerbeds and inched the porch furniture just a bit more toward the center of the porch. I'm not looking forward to crappy winter but, the pot of chili bubbling away on the stovetop is  nice reminder that winter has it's rewards.

In another lifetime, this would be the week that I executed my Annual Stay-at-Home-Mother Project; I would be spending the week baking cookies or cupcakes for the kids' school Halloween parties and putting the finishing touches on their Halloween costumes.

Instead, I am psyching myself up to attend the Man-Cub's first Middle School basketball game, a game that The Teenager will drive us to since she needs a few additional hours of driving time to complete the requirements for her Driver's Education class. Times, they do change.

Although, in all honesty, I do need to put the finishing touches on the Cub's Halloween costume so; the more things change, the more they stay the same.

I read that once; on a fortune cookie.

Sunday, October 23, 2011

Time Spent Together is Time Well Spent

Yesterday was jam-packed with fun fall favorites (say that ten times fast, go ahead; I'll wait); as planned, we visited the local corn maze and pumpkin patch where, for the low, low price of $48 we were entitled to lose ourselves amongst the corn stalks before picking our own pumpkins from the million-and-ten pumpkins available in the patch.

For $48, I could have purchased 12 pumpkins from the back of one of the numerous produce trucks parked haphazardly about town but, as Hugh said, that would have lacked the spirit of the season. Also, I don't need 12 pumpkins.

Anyway, it was a beautiful day and, roaming through the maze gave us time to enjoy our children (minus The Teenager's new boyfriend who opted not to accompany us, after all) despite the fact that The Teenager also managed to carry on at least six texting conversations while doing so (her ability to multi-task should come in handy in whatever career she pursues. Or, she will end up living in a cardboard box because bosses tend to  frown on employees texting their way through the workday; time will tell).

Anyhoodle, we got some pretty great pumpkins, which will come in handy next week when we carve jack-o-lanterns at our annual carving party.

After traipsing through the great oudoors, we traveled to Neighboring Town for dinner at the Olive Garden before spending yet another $48 for the privilege of standing in line for an hour just to be scared at a haunted house.

That $48, for the record, worth every penny.

And, time spent with my family, priceless, obviously.

Friday, October 21, 2011

This Post is Not About the Cat, I Swear

The kids got out of school at noon yesterday and are out all day, today. When they were younger and I was working at Old Job, this would have meant additional daycare costs and fretting over what everyone was doing while I was at work. Now and days, however, it means that, with the exception of an hour or two that the Man-Cub and I will spend at the store,  I am home with my babies, making plans for the rest of our weekend and resting on the couch.

I'm very blessed.

Speaking of plans for the weekend, barring any unforeseen complications, we will be visiting the local pumpkin patch/corn maze for an afternoon of family fun. We are also planning to take a trip to Neighboring City to have the wits scared out of us at a haunted house; the same haunted house that we visited last year. Well, not the same haunted house, that would be boring, but; a haunted house sponsored by the same group as the house last year.


One interesting change from last year will be the size of our party; The Crush will be accompanying us on one- or both- of our adventures as The Teenager has recently upgraded his status from crush to "Boyfriend", just don't say that in front of Hugh  (Or, do; what's one more bloody body in a house of horrors, after all?).

I'm sure we will have a good time.

What else? Let's see.. (really trying to avoid extraneous cat updates, here).. The Teenager's last volleyball game of the season was last night; they won. This weekend, I will wash her uniform and she will turn it in to the school but, not before I get a picture of her wearing it beside her brother who, not exactly coincidentally, will be wearing the same number (11) on his new basketball jersey.

Then, the Cub's basketball games start Tuesday so, I need not worry about jeopardizing the perfect shape of my Bleacher Butt prior to The Teenager starting club volleyball in January  (I wonder what the odds of her being assigned the number 11 jersey are?).

As an aside, all that cheerleading that I did in High School is really starting to pay off so, that was time well spent, obviously.

And, That's all I've got.

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

In Which I Contemplate Writing a Monthly Newsletter to the Cat

What can I say? My kids are getting older, I'm lacking for blog content. On the other hand, I do still have some degree of pride so, a quick update on the kitten's progress of assimilation into our family will have to do:

At just under eight weeks and one pound, Finnigan is the picture of good health. He's mastered the fine art of climbing onto the couch, is completely litter box-trained, and, as of last night; can finally navigate the staircase in both directions (except for the occasional tumble down the final two stairs, for some odd reason).

He was the hit of The Teenager's team dinner, charming even the cat-haters in the group (they do exist!) and, more recently; has learned how to defend himself against being crushed by Hugh's nocturnal acrobatics (note to other cats in a similar sleeping situation: claws in the back work wonders in getting a large man to roll back to his side of the bed).

Amazingly, the kitten has not drawn blood, once. None of us have reported even so much as a scratch, despite the kitten's recent foray into stalking our heels as we walk past furniture under which he is hiding. He also has an adorable habit of tucking himself underneath our chins as we hold him, with the added (and adorable) habit of gently patting our faces with his paw while purring, contentedly.

He's a keeper, we're thinking.

And, on to non-cat related news.


Yeah, I got nothing.

That monthly newsletter is starting to look better by the minute.

Yep. I'm still adorable. Thanks for noticing.

Let me get this straight; she won't let you in the house? Dude, you should try being more adorable. I'm serious.

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Team Dinner, By the Numbers

-10 pounds of taco meat.

-60 taco shells.

-48 tortillas.

-3 large cans of refried beans.

-2 containers of sour cream.

-1 1/2 pounds of shredded cheese.

-2 heads of lettuce.

-4 large tomatoes.

-1 economy-sized container of salsa.

-2 bottles of extra hot taco sauce.

-1 bottle of mild taco sauce.

-3 "Fiesta sized" bags of chips.

-1 large 7-layer dip.

-3 dozen sugar cookies.

-4 1/2 gallons of lemonade.

-60 minutes to polish it all off with nary a crumb left over.

-31 polite volleyball players making a point of saying "Thank you for dinner, it was delicious!" as they headed out the door.

-31 reasons that I would do it all again.

Monday, October 17, 2011

Preparing for an Invasion

The Teenager's team dinner is tonight. I'm planning a fairly low-stress menu featuring the ever-popular taco bar and a 7-layer dip that has proven to be quite well-liked at numerous Porch Nights. The house is clean, the tables on the porch have been prepped, the promise of a houseful of girls inspired the Man-Cub to shower and The Teenager helped me decorate three dozen sugar cookies last night so, barring really bad weather; we are as ready as we will ever be.

Once this dinner is over, my To-Do list will be fairly clear until the end of the month when my ASTRA club holds its' first annual Costume Ball and, to be honest; I'm looking forward to a little down-time. Not that I don't enjoy doing things for my kids; I just want a little free time to do the things that I enjoy doing this time of year, things like navigating the local corn maze and getting the wits scared out of me at the haunted house in Neighboring City.

Changing topics completely (because I can), this weekend, I ran into an old college friend. Literally. I was entering the gym at The Teenager's volleyball game in a town an hour and a half away when I tripped and fell on him. We hadn't seen each other since before graduation so it took us a couple of seconds to recognize each other but, once we did, it was quite a nice reunion.

And, in further evidence that it is truly a small world; our daughters were suite-mates at volleyball camp this past summer and have kept in touch via texting and Facebook and, of course, we had no idea. Too cool.

Also cool this weekend; my nephew, the Rebel Without a Cause, who was working on a natural gas rig nearby, was able to attend the volleyball games to watch The Teenager and to visit with us.

It's always good to spend time with family and I think The Teenager's serves were extra-wicked good because she was showing off for her cousin, whom she adores.

And, speaking of serving, I guess I should get started on the 7-layer dip; Invasion in T-minus nine hours and counting....

Thursday, October 13, 2011

Still Not Gettin' Jiggy With It

Yesterday, in yet another vain attempt to break out of my usual exercise routine, I popped an old DVD  into the player. I hadn't used that particular DVD recently and, it didn't take long to remember why I hadn't used it. The DVD is Carmen Electra’s Aerobic Striptease and It. Is. BAD. Or, I'm bad at it, either way. The good news is, I'm not any more bad at it than I was the last time I attempted it which was back in 2008, when I wrote the following description of the "workout"..

The video starts with Carmen and two prostitutes…I mean…dancers…dressed in terry cloth shorts and short-sleeved zippered hoodies, circa 1979. If you are picturing Crissy Snow from Three’s Company, there you have it. Anyhoo, Carmen, Crissy and Janet start us off with a nice, albeit smutty, warm-up and we’re off!

The head rolls with accompanying hair toss, I got down pat. Rocking the hips side to side took a bit more practice. Aggressively gyrating the hips while simultaneously thrusting the chest forward and sucking the index finger on the right hand while maintaining an alluring facial expression? I sucked at, exponentially. In fact, random onlookers would have easily mistaken me for a seizing epileptic rather than for an alluring, sexy, albeit, smutty, stripper.

Needless to say; the DVD has been officially retired to the Drawer of Shame. And, once again, I can assure you thatI will never be fit for an occupation that requires stilettos, a pole, and pasties complete with tassels. And, if you have ever seen me naked; you just breathed a huge sigh of relief.

Also, it’s probably time to renew my gym membership.

In other news, school is still going well. The Teenager is having some minor difficulty with one of her teachers; a man who seems to think that verbal abuse will roll off the child's back like water off a duck. Parent/Teacher conferences are next week; I'll see how well parental criticism rolls off his back and I'll let you know.

While the Man-Cub has yet to produce a single shred of homework, he did manage straight A's and B's on his midterm reports which leads me to assume that he is: a) so phenomenally advanced that he finished every assignment at school or b) has used his charming personality to cajole his teachers into grading on a unique curve. Conferences should settle that debate, as well.

And, now, I am off to walk/run around the park because I need the exercise and because sweats and a grungy old t-shirt are perfectly acceptable attire for the deed; no tittie-tassels required.

You're welcome, neighbor!

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

I Suck at Asking for Help

The team lunch this weekend is going to be a relatively simple affair; mini-submarine sandwiches, string cheese, grapes, individual packages of trail mix and bottled water.

Organizing the thing should be easy-peasy except; I suck at asking people for help. I mean, I really suck at it. So, what should have been a relatively simple matter of making a few phone calls has turned into making forty-some sandwiches, purchasing two cases of water and crossing my fingers that the one other parent who signed up to help won’t mind footing the bill for twelve pounds of grapes.

It’s ridiculous, really.

And, the lunch is only one example of this character flaw; I also fail to ask for help when planning events for my ASTRA club (This past weekend’s initiation ceremony, for example), when conducting business for my woman’s club (Fun Night ring any bells?) and, even when doing chores around the house.

I inevitably find myself fretting and stressing over how I'm going to accomplish everything that needs to be accomplished and, before long, the fretting and worrying leads to a Migraine or, at the very least, to a chocolate binge.

It’s beyond ridiculous, actually.

I would seek treatment for this near-pathological fear of imposing on other people’s time, talent and/or finances, but, yeah....see above: title of this post.

Le sigh.

Monday, October 10, 2011

Oh, Deer

It was a bloody good weekend at Casa de Chelle and, not just because the Man-Cub shot and killed his first doe, although, he did.

It was a clean kill and the kid could not have been more tickled. His dad was more than a bit proud as well and, while I'm not a huge fan of the venison; I do believe that learning to hunt is good for a boy. Or, for a girl, even. Someone's going to have to provide for the family in the event of Zombie Apocolypse, after all.

Just to be clear, though....

...still an animal lover.

And, speaking of one animal in particular; Hugh has taken to bringing Finnigan into bed with us. If I thought that sleeping with a tiny human was nerve-wracking (and I did. Co-sleeping was fraught with tension for me back in the day which was particularly depressing when one considers that the man-Cub refused to sleep unless he was cuddled on my chest, you know, for a year), then I should not have been surprised to learn that sleeping with a puff of fur is even worse; what if I roll over and squish the life out of him? How would I ever explain that to the children?

I haven't really been sleeping, is my point. Which, makes early mornings particularly brutal and; The Teenager's six A.M. date with the school bus on Saturday morning came far too early. I managed to rouse myself enough to get her to the school, of course, where she caught the bus to a town several hours away for a volleyball game that I had to miss because I had committed myself to installing another Lifeline.

Once the unit was installed, I decided to toss a coin between taking a nap, which might alleviate the bags I was carrying under my eyes, and cleaning out the garden, which was way overdue. Guilt won out over vanity and I spent the rest of the morning and afternoon pulling the last of the beets, beheading my sunflowers and picking the very last of the tomatoes from the plants before ripping them from the ground. Rowdie was, as one might expect, quite unhappy with that particular chore.

Once the garden was bare, I pulled the hummingbird feeders from the porch, washed them, and stored them away until next season. Next, I filled the bird feeders with seed as well as some of the sunflower seeds from the garden and hung them in the tree outside of our office window; soon I will be able to watch the birds swarm the feeders while working on the computer which is one of my favorite things to do during the dreary winter months.

Speaking of the tree outside the office window, last week it still looked like this...

Now, it looks like this...

It also snowed in the mountains around Petticoat Junction this weekend which is just one more nail in Autumn's coffin.

In happier news, I made it through the ASTRA initiation ceremony yesterday. Now, I can focus on organizing the team lunch for The Teenager's volleyball game this coming Saturday and on planning the team dinner next Monday and, once those things are behind me, I'll have nothing to do, why,  I'll be positively bored.

Wait, did you just hear God laughing?

Friday, October 07, 2011

Gentle Giant

We introduced Finnigan to Rowdie last night. The introduction went better than one might expect when placing a kitten weighing less than one pound in the path of a one-hundred-and-five-pound Labrador with boundary issues.

Rowdie was as well-behaved as he knows how to be which is to say; he kept the slobbering to a minimum and was careful not to roll over on top of the kitten, squishing him into a ginger pancake.

For his part, Finnigan showed no fear of the ginormous dog and instead, seemed to view him in equal parts plaything/surrogate-parent; initially utilizing Rowdie's tail as a chew toy before cuddling up on it like a baby in its' mother's arms.

Rowdie was unfazed by either action; I think he's missed Gilligan every bit as much as the rest of us.

I imagine he'll let Finn put on some weight before they begin plotting to take over the house.

Thursday, October 06, 2011

To Everything There is a Season

It's been almost nine months since we lost our sweet Gilligan.

Sometimes, in the kitchen, I see something out of the corner of my eye and my brain automatically tells my legs to move; to side-step the cat, sleeping on the rug in front of the stove. It takes my heart a split second to remind my brain that there is no sleeping kitty, only the space where that sweet ball of fur used to be.

We've all gotten better at entering the house without expecting to hear the gentle chime of the bell on Gilly's collar and, for the most part, we are able to talk about Gilly without choking up. For the most part.

But, that space, on the rug in front of the stove, it needs a warm kitty to sleep on it. We need to hear the chime of bells. We are a family that feels incomplete without the soft purr of a house cat.

You know where this is going, right?

Meet Finnigan, Finn for short.

We got him from some family friends yesterday. Today, it is pouring rain outside, the temperatures have dipped into the low fifties and I am making butternut squash soup from scratch, in my kitchen, with a kitten sleeping on the rug under the stove.

We will always miss our Gilligan but, today, our family feels a bit more whole, again and I think Gilly would approve.

Tuesday, October 04, 2011

Biting Off More Than I Can Chew

Sometimes I feel like Superwoman; like I can tackle any set of chores and finish them off without breaking a sweat. This is not one of those times.

I've got quite a bit on plate for this week and I am feeling fairly overwhelmed by it all. Today, for instance, I have to do the following:

-Fill out paperwork for the rental of the local Community Center for an upcoming ASTRA initiation ceremony.

-Attend my woman's club meeting where I need to plead for volunteers to provide sweet treats for that initiation ceremony.

-Purchase and print certificates for the initiation ceremony.

-Install a Lifeline in the home of a woman for whom it has become necessary.

-Attend The Teenager's volleyball game where I am scheduled to work in the Booster Booth, selling t-shirts. This should actually be fun since today's game is the annual Breast Cancer Awareness game at which our usual Pirate wear is supplemented with pink logo shirts, the proceeds of which go to support the fight against breast cancer.

-Somehow manage to sell pink boobie t-shirts while watching The Teenager play volleyball and selling tickets for a chance to hold the scissors when three of her teammates each surrender eight inches of hair to be made into wigs for cancer survivors.

-Connect with four other volleyball moms to plan the team lunch that we volunteered to provide for the girls during this weekend's away game.

And, that's just today.

The rest of the week will see me:

- Driving to Neighboring City to shop at Sam's Club for food for the above-mentioned team lunch and initiation (as well as for the team dinner that Hugh and I are hosting on the 17th).

- Attending the Man-Cub's final football game of the season.

-Meeting with representatives of Josten's to order The Teenager's class ring (Already!? Didn't I just take away her pacifier?)

-Signing the necessary paperwork for the Man-Cub to start basketball next week.

-Traveling two and a half hours away for volleyball and actually pulling off that team lunch (Saturday).

-Coordinating and hosting the initiation ceremony (Sunday).

None of which seems all that intimidating now that I have written it down.


Maybe I can do this after all. Now, where did I put that cape....

Sunday, October 02, 2011

He's Really Going to Have to Avoid Pre-Marital Sex and Illegal Drugs

The Man-Cub's football season comes to an end this Thursday and, while it would be a stretch to say that it was a winning season, I can say that the Man-Cub has enjoyed some success. He had an especially good game on Saturday, catching a pass in the end zone for the team's first touchdown, making several critical tackles, making an interception and, in one of the most exciting moments of the game, recovering a fumble by the opposing team and running the ball from their 10 yard line all the way to our ten yard line.

What's this? A fumbled ball?

I got it!

I'm running'. That's right, I'm running!

 Still running...*

It was a helluva run and would have resulted in the Cub's second touchdown of the day had it not been for him realizing that a rather large kid was closing in on him. This realization caused the child to stutter-step which led to him falling down.

And, while the run enabled his team to complete a pass play to to score, it did not bode well for the Cub's ability to outrun a serial killer in the event that he ever finds himself vacationing with his college buddies at an abandoned summer camp. I hope he takes the lesson to heart.

Speaking of which, this would be a good time for me to mention that I spent all day today decorating my house for Halloween. It wouldn't have taken all day had it not been for the horror show I discovered going on underneath my couch when I moved it to make room for some boxes; vacuuming under the couch led to a full house cleaning which led to reorganizing the Halloween boxes in the attic which led to window washing and rearranging of the furniture which rapidly ate away at the hours in my day.

On the bright side, my house looks awesome.

I was in the mood to decorate for the holiday because I spent yesterday driving over a scenic mountain pass and the colors were especially inspiring. I was driving over the mountain pass to attend The Teenager's volleyball game, a trip that I will repeat again next weekend, and, the one after that. And, the one after that. Obviously, if the house was going to get decked out for All Hallows Eve, it was going to have to be done today.

Oh, and The Teenager's teams won the games. And, The Teenager played marvelously which is sort of becoming a trend for her (knock on wood). This gives me renewed hope for at least half of my offspring being able to outrun a chainsaw-wielding serial killer without tripping over their own feet.

*Not pictured: The Man-Cub tripping over his own feet and falling down. The photographer was too busy laughing to push the shutter button.