Wednesday, November 07, 2007

As Long As She Doesn't Drink the Kool-Aid

Yesterday The Girl called me from school to tell me that she had joined the band. Her tone of voice was a twee bit defensive; better suited to declaring that she had joined a cult than a program included in the school curriculum. It was almost as though she was worried that, upon hearing her declaration, I would immediately forbid her doing it.

And, you know, hire deprogrammers to throw her ass in a windowless van right in front of all her classmates.

Ok, that would be cool.

And, I digress.

So, I am not a musical person but, as I may have mentioned (ten or twenty times), I participated in band when I was in High School and it was a great experience so; I have no idea why she might suspect that I would be anything but pleased.

Kids, they are weird.

Anyway, I asked her what instrument she was thinking of playing and braced myself for her response (drums? Are you sure you wouldn’t rather join that cult, hon?). To my relief, she thought that the flute would be her chosen instrument and I heartily approve. For one thing, I can actually see her playing the flute.

In fact, was she ever called upon to represent an animated instrument in a Disney cartoon; she could totally be a flute. She is long and thin, delicate and, you know, able to screech at a pitch that a flute would have no difficulty in producing.

What? You don’t assign animated characters to people you see in everyday life? You have never, for example, while trapped in an endless ballet class; envisioned your child’s ballet instructor as a purple hippopotamus in a hot pink tutu as she led the class in a demi-pliĆ© series at the barre? No?

You lack imagination, my friends.

(Also, in the interest of full disclosure I should mention that my son is a dead ringer for Mowgli, the jungle boy which, hello, Man-Cub, like, duh! Also, my father is totally Baloo. Not that he knows that, but, there ya go. Oh. I guess he knows it now. Hi, Dad!)


Yeah, The Girl is joining the band. I hope she has a talent for the flute and an interest in sticking with band throughout her school years.

Because I am totally looking forward to chaperoning band trips; I know what goes on on those trips.


  1. Would you kindly fill in those of us that don't know about band trips? My son has his first one next month and now I am a little bit scared.

  2. I have been a flute player for 20 years. Beware the day when she decides she needs an instrument with a low 'B' foot - that's when things get kinda pricey :) If you can get past the first....oh....year or so with your sanity intact (hearing her practice may be painful for a while), you're golden!

  3. Dana, band trips can be epic events, life-changing events. And they're fun. Don't believe all you hear about them, trust me when I say the band directors know all about the "6 pack in the toilet tank" trick. But a well planned trip will expand his horizons. Where's he off to?
    And LMK if I can help with any flute issues. I taught (dang, I hate that past tense...sigh) flute lessons for (OMG!) 17 years...half my life (hyperventilating here), so I can help out. Please, oh please, don't get an Artley or a Bundy (run!!!). Yamaha flutes tack a lickin' and keep on playin'.
    I'm so glad The Girl is joining band. My very favorite memories are from being in band; I even my Tom through band (he was my TA in college teehee) and he's conducting an adult concert band concert tonight. We're band geeks through and through here. :)