25 Days of Christmas: Day 25, the Countdown Begins

Soooo, yeah…December 1st and I have accomplished almost nothing on my Holiday To Do list. Usually, by this time, I have mailed all of my out-of-town presents, ordered my Christmas cards, started baking and decorated the house. What have I done so far this year? Decorated the house. To say that I feel a bit overwhelmed and behind already this holiday season would be an understatement.

Granted, I will have my cards ordered by this evening (just received the Get ‘Em FREE code from Shutterfly!) and, I have my out-of town presents purchased, I just have to wrap them and package them for shipping which, really, shouldn’t take more than an hour.

And, I could start baking this evening as well, you know, after I take the Man-Cub to tutoring and to basketball practice. Oh! And, after Hugh and I attend the High School’s wrestling team’s annual fundraising banquet. And, of course, after I wrap those gifts and order those cards.

But, why rush, right? I still have 24 days.

Commence hyperventilating into a paper sack in….three, two, one…

If Scrooge Had Known About Shutterfly, He Would Have Been Less, Well... SCROOGISH

Every year I wrangle the children together for our annual Christmas card photo session and folks? It. Is Never. Fun.

You know what is fun? Using Shutterfly to design cool cards using those photos. And, while the photo session might take anywhere from one to five years off my lifespan, the ease with which I place my Shutterfly order makes the life I have left worth living.

Last night, I uploaded the pictures from my most recent session of banging my head against a wall our most recent photo session. Then, I perused the enormous collection of cards from which to choose this year’s design. It was no easy task considering how awesome all of the designs are, but, I found a few favorites, designs like this

 and this.

When I was finished creating my own unique card (which you will not be seeing because it is a surprise), I spent some time looking at the fun calendar designs offered by Shutterfly. Photo calendars would make an awesome gift for friends and family so; I’m thinking of doing a sports-themed one featuring The Teenager and the Man-Cub (they do play sports year-round, after all, perfect material for a calendar). And, by thinking about it, I mean totally not doing it, Mom and Dad; the two of you are getting socks and underwear for Christmas. Say thank you!

Oooh, speaking of saying thanks, I should order some neat thank you cards to give to all the people who are kind enough to think about us this holiday season, Shutterfly has them, too. In fact, Shutterfly is one-stop shopping for people like me who enjoy using their creativity to produce one-of-a-kind gifts. Also, for people like me who hate to fight the crowds in the stores and who prefer to do their shopping from the comfort of their own homes. With a stiff drink to dull the pain from banging their head against the wall steaming mug of cocoa in their hands.

In addition, Shutterfly’s prices can’t be beat; the cards I chose normally cost a mere .90 each and they are going to be beautiful. And, free.

Ebenezer would totally approve

Another Year Older, None the Wiser

I had another birthday yesterday which officially makes me OLD. And, you know, old isn’t so bad; I get to ignore my son’s pitiful pleas for yet another ridiculously over-priced Leggo set at the Hellmouth and blame it on age-related deafness. I can excuse myself from Wii bowling on the grounds that I might snap a hip and, I get to indulge in frequent afternoon naps because that is what old people do.

Two points for aging.

Of course, when I was younger, I thought that old people had all the answers, knew what to do in any situation as well as the right thing to say for every occasion. Now, since I don’t know jack shit about anything, I have to assume that I was wrong ; aging won’t automatically make me smarter and that sucks.

I’ll take my two points back, now.

Speaking of points, I’m totally considering joining Weight Watchers Online after the first of the year. I have heard that counting points is a really easy way to help lose weight and, since I only want to lose a few pounds, it shouldn’t take very long. Plus, joining the program entitles me to recipes from the website and, lately my culinary arsenal is empty; I need new ideas.

Plus, I read somewhere that you can eat as many Christmas cookies as you want, after January 1st because calories don’t count in Christmas cookies once the holiday is over.

That’s my kind of program.

And, yeah, none the wiser, obviously.

Gah.

Black Friday: Blacker for Some than Others

I get the distinct impression that Otis the Hardware Store Cat doesn’t like his new holiday uniform…

First clue? He blew raspberries at the camera; I didn’t even know a cat could do that.

Then, he hid his face as though in shame; I think he is worried about losing street cred with the other tomcats in the neighborhood.

The Man-Cub gave him a straw and told him to suck it up…

...because, this could get a kid beat up in Middle School. You know, if word got out. Or, if your mother posted it to say, Facebook. Not that she would, or anything. I'm just sayin'.

Hmm, me thinks they call this leverage. Black Friday is starting to look up.

Things To Be Thankful For

Free range turkey that practically melts in your mouth.

Healthy, if not slightly strange, children.

A husband who is willing to put up the Christmas tree before the turkey carcass is even cold.

At least one more day together.

We are blessed.

It’s Beginning to Smell a Lot Like Thanksgiving

There is a pumpkin pie baking in my oven, a pot of homemade turkey broth simmering on the stovetop and a pan of cranberry sauce merrily boiling away on the burner next to it; I’m feeling pretty smug about my culinary expertise right about now.

That is not to say that I have accomplished this all alone, indeed; the Man-Cub assisted in the making of the pie by seeding the pumpkins, peering anxiously into the oven as they roasted, pureeing the cooked pumpkin in the food processor, adding ingredients to the mixing bowl and pouring the batter into the pie shell. He is destined for a future as a pastry chef with his own reality television show, a line of high-priced exotic spices and a horde of groupies. Or, at the very least, he will be a connoisseur of pumpkin pie and there’s no shame in that.

Tomorrow, I plan to get an extra hour or so of sleep before wrestling Foghorn Leghorn (who, by the way was apparently a rooster, at least according to Wikipedia. Why did I think he was a turkey? I have no idea. Do I really care? No; my turkey looks like a Foghorn Leghorn therefore, he is) out of his salt bath. I’ve got the base of my stuffing ready to go so; I’ll just have to add vegetables, butter and broth to it before shoving it all up in Foghorn’s bidness and throwing him into the oven.

While he cooks, I’ll bake my rolls (double ovens, oh how I love thee!), prepare mashed potatoes, green bean casserole and sweet potato casserole. Also, during the day, I plan to watch the Macy’s parade with the kids while we decorate our Christmas tree. I’m also going to set up the rest of my decorations and, if the stars align just right, to take Christmas card photos of the kids. Really, though, since it will just be Hugh, the kids and me for dinner, I’m looking forward to it being a relaxed day.

And I’m thankful for that.

Preparing To Do Battle

My fresh-from-the-farmer (Grower? Rancher?)-turkey arrived today and I am pleased to report that he arrived both naked and headless. In addition, I’m relatively certain that the tasty bits of his innards are indeed safely tucked away in a little baggie located somewhere up his hoo-ha; I just haven’t had a chance to get all up in his business to make sure. Give me an hour or so.

Then, I plan to submerge Foghorn Leghorn in a bucket full of tasty brine where he will marinate for the next thirty-six hours before being subjected to a fisting with stuffing and a slow roast in a hot oven at which point my recurring nightmares featuring half-decapitated zombie turkeys armed with bloody basters and trussing twine will certainly cease in their entirety.

Fingers crossed.