On Your Last Day

 Dear Boomer Dog,

Yesterday, Dad and I did the hardest thing that pet parents can do; we let you go.

You had let us know that it was time, and, while it was hard (so very hard); we knew you were right. A pet parent's only responsibilities are to give their fur babies a good life and a peaceful death. We wanted that for you; a peaceful death. We'd already given you the best life that we possibly could in the short (too short) time that you were with us.

Your last hours were spent doing the things that we know you loved. You followed Dad around while he mowed the yard. You chased your favorite ball and the small tire that we kept in the backyard. I blew bubbles for you to chase. We gave you all the best treats, although your appetite had waned and your interest in them was greatly diminished.

In the last minutes, we gave you Hershey's Kisses, because no dog should leave this earth without tasting chocolate.

I couldn't bear to take you to the vet; your anxiety and separation anxiety anytime we took you somewhere that you feared you may be abandoned (we would never) broke me, and I wasn't about to subject you to that worry.

Instead, our vet agreed to come to the house, where we were lounging on the lawn, in the shade of the porch, in your favorite spot; the one where you would flop down when you were tired from playing catch, or chasing the water from the hose, or bored from watching me weed the flowerbed or Dad set up the annual skeleton display (which he started on yesterday, just so you could be present one last time). 

You were tired. So very tired. The tumor in your anal sac had swelled to a size that made it impossible for you to continue. The pressure from the tumor was pressing on the nerves in your legs and it was getting difficult for you to get up; the swelling in your leg broke our hearts. But, you stayed our happy boy, smiling right up to the end.

You went so peacefully.

I have always believed two things when it comes to you: I believe that, before you were my boy, you belonged to a woman who loved you very much and that you lost her. I think she was waiting for you on the other side. I also believe that you were sent to me to offer protection at a time when the Lord knew that I would need it. You know that I'm safe and that it was ok for you to go.

I'm missing you today, Booms.

I'm going to miss you forever.

I'm so eternally grateful for the time that I had with you. I'm a better person for having had a dog who loved me as much as you did.

I'll see you again, my boy. And you can introduce me to your other mom. I bet you made her a better woman, too.

Love, Mom