Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Blah, Blah, Blah...My Ass Hurts... Blah, Blah, Blah

So, yeah; nothing new to report.

Hey, I know! Let's talk about the weather! Can you believe that it has actually been quite pleasant around here the past couple of days? Well, it has. The warmer temperatures have been a welcome change and, I'm pleased to report, my tulips finally decided that maybe, just maybe, now would be a good time to actually bloom. I know! And here I was, determined to rip the little bastards right out of the ground; lucky for them, they got with the program.

Speaking of things that should grow; Hugh aerated and mowed the lawn last night and is planning to turn on the sprinklers this weekend.

I am somewhat dubious of the lawn's chances for survival as several rather large spots (um, the backyard) appear to be dead. I haven't voiced my concerns to Hugh because, as evidenced by my stellar gardening efforts last summer; I suck at growing anything other than acne on my chin and spare rolls of flesh with which to pad my waist and ass.

So, I'll leave the fretting over the lawn to my husband.

Besides, I have other things to frett over; baseball, anyone?

Practices have been going well but, our team is a motley crew, to say the least. And, by motley crew, I mean that they lack the coordination and skill of more seasoned players, not that they routinely whip out guitars and break into a spirited rendition of Shout at the Devil although, that would be awesome.

They are a determined bunch, I will give them that. And, they are all preciously, adorably, ridiculously good looking, long, gangly limbs and all. Seriously, we have a team of little heartbreakers-in-the-making and; I feel super-sorry for the girls in, oh... say, five years.

Anyway, our first game is next Tuesday. I won't actually be attending the game as I am hosting my Bunco group that same evening and I take my hostessing duties seriously. So seriously in fact, I am planning to serve refreshments on actual dishes rather than on paper plates, which is my usual modus operandi; nothing says "I'm glad you all decided to be my friends" like washing dishes, I always say.

Ooooh, that last sentence reminded me of Drew Barrymore's performance in HBO's Gray Gardens. If you haven't seen it, I highly recommend it; the Beale women will make you feel realllly secure in your own sanity.

Or, you'll have discover people who share your particular brand of Crazy in which case, damn,

Bless your little heart.

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