It’s Only a Number, It’s Only a Number, It’s Only a number….
I stepped on the scale this morning and just about crapped my pants.
Ok, that is a slight exaggeration-I don’t wear pants when I weigh in; I go naked as the day I was born in hopes of eliminating even a few extra ounces. But! That is all beside the point. The point is; I am a mere twenty pounds away from my Scary Weight-the weight that I was at five years ago when I went on my Magical Life-Changing Fitness Streak and lost almost forty pounds and, if you are no math genius, let me break it down for you...I have gained back TWENTY FREAKING POUNDS in just a little over a year and a half.
Naturally, when I saw the number in all its digital glory; I got pissed-why have I been busting my ass and eating like a monk (monks don’t eat much, right? Oh, wait, monks don’t talk. Hmm, well, what the fuck ever) just to gain weight? Then, I reminded myself that I have only been eating well and exercising again for like, a week and, before that I was downing fluffy sugar cookies and mainlining donuts with sprinkles so, yeah, what exactly was I expecting?
And, I hopped off the Crazy train and vowed to continue on the path that I am currently on-the path to better health (and a far more acceptable number on the freaking scale, hellooo, bikini season!).
That said; I am going to Pilates today. Maybe the Bionic Woman can jump-start my weight loss.
In other excercise news, the Man-Cub has been doing a great job with his vision therapy. The therapist is pleased with his determination and enthusiasm (Man-Cub: I’m supposed to throw this bean bag at that trampoline and catch it when it bounces back? Fifty times in a row? Suh-weet!) and we are working diligently with him at home. In fact, I get up a half hour early to allow time to supervise his exercises.
At first I was worried that he would get bored with the project and begin to fight me so; I bought a mega-pack of temporary tattoos with which to bribe him-complete the exercises for the day, get a tattoo, yay!
Who would have thought that he would enjoy the exercises so much that bribery would be totally unnecessary?
For my part, I don’t exactly enjoy getting up a half hour early to swing a ball over my child’s head while recording the smoothness (or lack thereof) of his eye movements but, I do it; I do it for him and, his improved reading will be all the reward I need.
Plus, you know, I don’t really care for tattoos.