The Village People Would Be So Proud
Earlier this morning, I had some items to drop off at a business located in one of our nicer strip-malls. I accidentally entered the wrong door and was greeted by two handsome young men seated behind official looking desks wearing blank stares.
The young men were wearing the blank stares, not the official looking desks, in case you were confused.
It took me a mere second or two to realize that, not only was I in the wrong business but; I was in the Navy recruiting office. Because I’m quick like that.
It didn’t take the two geniuses behind the official looking desks very long to figure it out, either.
Handsome Young Man #1: You appear to be in the wrong place, Ma'am.
Chelle: You think?
Handsome Young Man #2: Welllll….
Chelle: So, it’s obvious that I’m a screamer, huh?
Handsome Young Man#1 (blushing a furious shade of magenta): I wouldn’t presume to think such a thing, Ma’am.
Chelle (realization dawning, because, again; I’m quick like that): Oh god! I didn’t mean a screamer like that! I meant like an Oh my god, please don’t shoot at me! screamer. I swear!
I should add that I was using the most suggestive body language imaginable throughout the entire exchange, including the part where I denied being a screamer like that.
Handsome Young Man # 2: Yes, well, um….have a nice day?
I jetted out the door faster than any torpedo either of those boys has seen in their entire- all-be-it short-Naval careers. On the bright side, judging by the decline in enlistments since the war; it was probably the most human interaction they had-outside of each other-all day. They have me to thank for it.
I am patriotic. Spastic and semi-mentally challenged but, patriotic.