Could This Vacation Be Any Better?
My best friend, Jules, arrived from California yesterday for a surprise visit. She came to help me get my drunk on and to spoil my children both of which she proceeded to do, immediately. In addition, she brought one of her girlfriends from California with her and, judging by his full-on flirt attack at last night’s Neal McCoy concert; I think my son has developed a huge crush on her. At least he has good taste because she is a doll and, you know, delightfully snarky.
As an aside, during the concert Neal McCoy played a cover of Wild Cherry's Funky Music and my children knew every word of the lyrics and jammed out like rock stars; who's got geeky taste in music, now, Hugh? Huh? That's what I thought.
Back to the subject of The Snark, having Jules here gives me someone to people-watch with and, since she is possibly even better at the Snark than I am; we are having quite the fabulous time. At the dance following the concert, we spent several hours critiquing the many, many bad boob jobs on display. And, while I am on the subject, what is up with that? As a fairly well-endowed person who began the battle against gravity at a tender age; I cannot begin to fathom why anyone would want to purchase boobs far larger than that which their body frame can support. On the other hand, in five years, those girls are going to be mopping the floor with those puppies just like I will be so; I guess we’ll have something in common. We can trade advice about miracle bras and hoists and such.
In other news, we learned that the aquatics center I used to run is slated for demolition later this fall. That makes me very sad since I not only worked there as an adult but spent many a summer day there during my childhood. Also, when a new sidewalk was being poured in front of the building in 1996, my daughter’s feet were forever immortalized in the cement. She was four or five months old at the time and I will never forget my boss swooping her up out of her crib and racing outside to get her imprints before the cement set; he and his Parks foreman struggled to keep her tiny little toes from scrunching together and ruining the impression and my boss kept hollering “Gentle, gentle! Don’t pinch her piggies, man!” while she looked at them both like they were completely insane.
And, just between you and me, Internet; Hugh is bringing a concrete saw when he comes to town this afternoon and we are totally taking back my daughter’s feet. Jules has predicted that we are all going to get arrested but, she also admits that it wouldn’t be the first time so, yeah.
Like I said, could this vacation get any better? I think not.