Wednesday, December 15, 2010

25 Days of Christmas: Day 11, The Demented Have No Business Decorating Cookies

Last night’s cookie-decorating extravaganza went smashingly well; the project took two hours, a double recipe of frosting, a viewing of the entire DVD of National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation and the patience of a host of heavenly angels. We worked side-by side as a family but, in the end, it was our individual decorating styles that resulted in the most eclectic collection of cookies produced in our kitchen to date.

For instance, I toiled over each cookie, attempting a work of art with each new design. The Teenager, on the other hand, decorated her cookies in an assembly-line fashion, finishing in record time, with near-identical results.

The Man-Cub created the most, um…unique cookies which actually comes as no surprise given his penchant for using as many edible decorative items as possible per cookie and, you know, the fact that he is color blind.

Hugh’s cookies warrant a discussion all their own most notably for the fact that he crafted such interesting items as:

-A group of three snowmen upon which something had peed, seriously; yellow spots in the otherwise pure white snow. Oh, and one of them was wearing a fig leaf over his private parts. For the record? I didn’t know snowmen had private parts, either.

-The Liberty Bell. No cheesy silver Christmas bells for him; history is alive and well as residing in our cookie tin.

-Officer Santa Claus, otherwise known as Santa in a policeman’s uniform, complete with silver badge and holstered gun which, will come in handy should the elves become unruly and stage a coup of Santa's workshop.

-A red and green striped reindeer.

In the end, we had a good time and, I can check one more chore off my holiday To Do list. Two items, actually, since we will be using many of the cookies to fill gift baskets for friends and neighbors.

With the obvious exception of the peed-on snowmen. I mean, really.


  1. What? No photos?!

  2. I'm with Erika... where are the stinkin' pictures??????

  3. I was so exhausted after the whole thing that I threw the cookies in the cookie tin and tossed the whole thing in the freezer. We haven't touched them since. However, once they come out for the goody trays, I will arrange them in artful tableaus and photograph them accordingly, I'm thinking; Officer Santa citing the peeing snowmen for indecent exposure. Except for the fig leaf-wearing snowman, of course. That kid has his head on right.