I can't believe I made it! I hung in alllll summer long! I may be the strongest competitor this season, although, that's not saying much. But, onto this (final, thank GOD!) episode.
- Whoa, Jury, bitter much?
- Ha! Mark = The Incredible Sulk! Good one, Matt. Why weren't you that clever when you were actually IN the house?
- Dr. Will is starting to show his age. He's still a handsome son-of-a-gun, though.
- Cheezus crackers, Matt, shave that fucking animal off your chin.
- We are thisclose to never having to see Alex's cleavage again. Hallelujah!
- Oh, my! Josh's sisters look exactly how I would expect Josh to look if he were in drag. That's...not a compliment.
- And Josh wins the final HOH competition. Huh. Didn't see that coming.
- If he chooses to take Paul to the final two, he is even dumber than I think he is.
- Aaaaand he IS even dumber than I thought he was.
- Well, this is a contest between two really unlikeable people.
- Oh, goody, time for Jury questions; this won't end in bitter recriminations. Not at all.
- Oh wow, Christmas is so thin, you could use her sternum as a washboard. Not her abs, her sternum.
- Hey, you know who I don't miss? Jessica.
- Is Kevin seriously wearing a tux? There aren't enough eye rolls in the world.
- Alex, your bitch face is showing.
- Crap. I totally forgot the patronizing head pat they give to the house guests evicted prior to jury selection; guess we'll be seeing the Jess and Cody reunion play out live. Where's my vomit bucket?
- Jess: "I told you so". Again, not enough eye rolls in the world.
- I think Paul's head is growing even as we watch.
- And the winner is.....Josh? Wait, what?
- Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha!
- In your face, Paul!! Please don't come back next season. Actually, maybe I won't come back next season.
And, that's it, folks! We made it! Thanks for hanging in there with me.
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