Sunday, August 02, 2015

Oh, Hi! Did I Wake You?

In the three years that Guinness has called our house his, he has developed a sweeter and sweeter personality. He has also become more and more comfortable in his surroundings and a lot less skittish. Granted, he still disappears like a fluffy marmalade ghost the second someone he doesn't know enters the house, but, for the most part, he appears to be quite at home and totally secure in our love for him.

Which, can be the only explanation for his recent habit of waking me up at 5:00 in the morning on weekends by licking my head with his sandpapery-yet surprisingly wet-tongue.

What the hell, cat? The weekends are my time to sleep in. Yes, I know you are staaaaarving (how could you not be, what with the gravity feeder that is constantly at your disposal and all), but, still! 5:00 A.M! I am sleeping! If the can of wet food that you get each morning is the balance between life and death for you, then you really need to think twice before pissing off the hand that-literally-feeds you.

Let me sleep, for heaven's sake!

And, don't think for one minute that summersaulting at my feet and peering up at me with your sweet furry face while you await a belly rub will soften my stance on this; I am tired and cranky and I am mad at you.


Fuck.

Fine, you're forgiven. Let's not let it happen again.

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