Dear Mother Nature: You Suuuuuck
Seriously, Mother Nature? Did you not get the memo about it being spring? Do you not see what you are doing to my beautiful tulips, not to mention the fact that you are smothering my tender radish, beet and pea sprouts? The peas, Mother Nature, this was supposed to be my year for the peas! I started early like my friend, the farmer, told me to! I was supposed to have a bumper crop and then you go and pull this! The hell, Mother Nature? I demand an explanation.
Signed, Irritated in Colorado
P.S. Global Warming my shiny white ass.